Winter games, Bond-style

The Winter Olympics always make me want to watch James Bond, probably because Bond himself has always had an affinity for winter sports. While the athletes at Sochi face the true dangers inherent to such competition, Bond's winter games entail more outlandish challenges. Here's a look at some of 007's best events.

Skiing

For Bond, skiing includes threats even more sinister than a biased Olympic judge. The danger could be in the form of gunmen on skis . . .

On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)

The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)

. . . gunmen shooting from the villain's lair . . .

On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)

. . . gunmen on motorcycles . . .

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

. . . gunmen in snowmobile propeller parachute things . . .

The World Is Not Enough (1999)

. . . or an avalanche.

On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)

Bond doesn't always ski with traditional equipment; spiked tires and outrigger skids make even his Aston Martin suitable for the slopes.

The Living Daylights (1987)

Ski Jumping

Bond's ski runs sometimes include a jump motivated more by the need for escape than by the thrill of victory.

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Though a traditional hill is often passed over in favor of a cliff . . .

The World Is Not Enough (1999)

. . . a helicopter . . .

The World Is Not Enough (1999)

. . . a roof . . .

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

. . . or a picnic table . . .

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Some jumps require special equipment . . .

The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)

. . . and all look better with explosions.

The World Is Not Enough (1999)

Snowboarding

You know, while being shot at by gunmen on skis.

A View to a Kill (1985)

Ice Skating

Skating makes Bond nervous, especially when he needs to fend off an awkward infatuation.

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Hockey

Bond's hockey is a contact sport with badly unbalanced teams.

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Bobsledding

A sled is not always required. Chasing a sled while on skis still gets points, provided Bond is himself being chased by a henchman on a motorbike.

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Sleds can also be improvised, as from a cello case.

The Living Daylights (1987)

An actual bobsled is preferable, however, because it offers more room for grappling with archenemy Blofeld.

On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)

See also: Bonding Ritual

Bonding Ritual

"Bond...James Bond." (Dr. No, 1962)

Dr. No

Over the past 50 years, since the release of Dr. No, the James Bond formula has become more memorable than any of the nefarious plots unleashed by the secret agent's many adversaries. Whatever evil scheme Dr. No was planning (I vaguely recall something about the "global economy"...or was that Goldfinger?) is blotted out by the memory of Ursula Andress as Honey Rider emerging from the ocean, Venus-like, in the instantly famous white bikini. Still, Bond movies have remained enjoyable, even when they haven't been very good, due in part to the formula itself, which plays out like a ritual in film after film. While Bond devotees may not hurl toast or toilet paper during a screening, we nonetheless take pleasure in recognizing the following familiar elements each time.

On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)	Opening shot of James Bond being tracked through a gun barrel accompanied by his twangy theme music. He turns, fires at the camera, and blood runs down the screen.
License to Kill (1989)	Pre-credits sequence of Bond wrapping up a mission related (or not) to the film, culminating in a spectacular stunt.
Goldeneye (1995)	Opening titles consisting of silhouetted nude women dancing suggestively — often next to or on top of guns — accompanied by the singing of a famous pop star (one in seven times it's Shirley Bassey).
Tomorrow Never Dies (1997)	M recalls Bond from his current mission or time off, interrupting a romantic moment.
From Russia With Love (1963)	Bond enters the MI6 offices by tossing his hat onto the hat rack...
On Her Majesty's Secret Service	...then flirts with M's secretary, Miss Moneypenny, who tells him that she wishes he'd make a serious offer.
The Man With the Golden Gun (1974)	Bond has a mission briefing with M, where he often surprises his boss with an exposition-rich recitation on the villain or valuable object in question.
Goldeneye	Q presents Bond with a host of new weaponized gadgetry, admonishing him to return it in working order.
The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)	Bond drives an expensive sports car tricked out with top-secret features.
Goldeneye	007 introduces himself as "Bond...James Bond."
Die Another Day (2002)	Bond orders a medium dry vodka martini, shaken, not stirred.
The Man With the Golden Gun	Compulsive use of clichéd innuendo ("rise to the occasion," "pump her for info," "cunning linguist", etc.).
Goldfinger (1964)	One or more of the women encountered by Bond have sexually suggestive names (Pussy Galore, Plenty O'Toole, Octopussy, Chew Mee, Xenia Onatopp, Holly Goodhead, etc., etc.)
Goldfinger	Bond sleeps with the bad guy's girlfriend, who is subsequently killed by the villain for her betrayal.
Dr. No	An attempt is made on Bond's life via complicated or exotic method.
License to Kill	Bond kills a henchman in an unusual and gruesome fashion.
The Spy Who Loved Me	The villain's henchman has an unusual physical appearance and/or deadly trait.
Tomorrow Never Dies	Stunt-laden chase scene involving cars, boats, skis, motorcycles, and/or helicopters.
On Her Majesty's Secret Service	Bond confronts the colorful villain in his elaborate lair...
Goldfinger	...is subsequently trapped there...
The Spy Who Loved Me	...then gets free, defeats the villain, rescues the "Bond girl," and escapes before the lair explodes.
Dr. No	Bond and his female companion are radioed or found by the Royal Navy as they drift aimlessly on a body of water. Bond shuts off the radio or otherwise thwarts the rescue in favor of sex.
The Spy Who Loved Me	Reprise of theme song during closing credits, followed by "The End...James Bond will return in..."

See also: Winter games, Bond-style